I was telling a friend yesterday about my New Year’s Eve; I mentioned that a young woman (mid-twenties) asked me to come home (sic – her hotel room) with her as she was leaving the bar. Her sister was visiting her, so I didn’t know if they were sharing a hotel room or not, and she seemed pretty soused. I left the bar a half hour after she did and received a message from her on my way home, asking me if I was going to come over. No, I said — I was going home to sleep instead. My friend interrupted me at this point in the story and said, “Why didn’t you go?” “I guess I was more tired than horny,” I said. “Yeah,” he said — “That sounds like the entirety of my thirties.” When did that happen? Ten years ago, I would have done this without question. Fumbly, drunk 3:00am sex doesn’t have the same appeal that it used to.
(It should be noted here that I tried to have an actual conversation with this girl at a few points in the night, and we just had no rapport. Like, crickets were chirping in the background. If I had found her intellectually stimulating, I would have gone… so I guess this story isn’t about lowering libido so much as it’s about becoming more selective in my sexual partners.)