Work in Progress

I love butt stuff.  Plugs, fingers, vibrating plugs, rimming, beads, plugs of various shapes and sizes, pegging, and – have I mentioned plugs?  I love them.  That said – anal sex isn’t really my thing.

Having a partner slide a finger into my ass while licking my puss?  Definitely my thing, and my clitoral orgasms are so much more intense when combined with anal stimulation.  I often incorporate beads and plugs when I wank, especially to tip me over the edge.  Riding a partner’s dick with a vibrating butt plug in so he can feel the vibrations through my vaginal wall?  Absofuckinglutely.  I often fantasize about double penetration – sitting on a dick reverse cowgirl style and lying back on that gent while having another fuck me missionary style while other people watch.  Giving languid analingus at the end of a long body massage makes me drip, and putting on a strap-on, making it goopy and slick with lube, and sliding it into a wriggling ass that can’t wait to be penetrated, only to hear a deep groan of satisfaction, makes my heart pound.  PIA, though?  That I could take or leave.

Then again – maybe I just haven’t given it a fair shot.  The first time I tried anal was in uni; we lubed up, used fingers first as a warm up, and… it was good.  Not great, but good.  The second time we tried I really got into it.  Then one night my boyfriend was pounding me hard from behind and his dick accidentally slipped into my ass (yes, this really does happen); it hurt so bad that I didn’t want to try anal with him again.  I tried with another partner a year later, and then didn’t do it again until a decade later when I started dating The Texan, and then only once.  I think that part of it is that I’ve gone on dates and had one-night stands with a lot of men who want to fuck me in the ass, but would never in a million years allow themselves to be pegged – and that just doesn’t sit right with me.  If someone expects me to take their cock in my rectum but won’t even try a finger in theirs to see what it feels like, they’re probably out the door.

Anal sex is not a casual sex activity for me.  It’s something I’ve only ever wanted to do in relationships in which I feel I can really trust my partner to pull back, slow down, or stop if I feel uncomfortable – so maybe now is a good time to give it another try.  A noble goal for 2018.  The Engineer and I are keen (but he also has quite a sizable cock, which makes me a bit nervous), and it’s something we talk about doing often; I’ll make working up to it a goal for our next visit.  “Let’s go home so you can put it in my butt” would probably make a welcome airport greeting, don’t you think?

One Down

Still in a sex haze from a long, giddy night of pot and orgasms that stretched into a morning of devouring all the leftovers in my flat before devouring each other, I lie silent for a minute, listening to the door click behind him as his footsteps run down my stairs outside.  Everything is perfectly still and calm; I can hear birds chirping and see the first rays of sun starting to penetrate the sky.  It’s too early for traffic – and besides, no one would be out on a Sunday morning.  Except him.  Perhaps whistling while he walks; perhaps listening to music.  Definitely thinking about the way I taste.

I reach into my nightstand drawer and pull out a Batman stationery pad, flipping it open to the first page on which I’ve written the beginning of a list:

Double butt plug

Saran wrap fuck

Bound, spread-eagle fuck


The list goes on.  I’d written it after a long conversation we’d had a few weeks prior in which we spent hours talking dirty about the things we wanted to do together.  I had snapped a quick photo of it with my phone, sending it to him as a kind reminder; sure, there were things I had in a mental life-long fucket list of unlikely situations, but he was a rare and beautiful partner: the kind I could suggest any fantasy to, knowing he’d be game.  I wanted to have a special fucket list for us. 

I grab a pen and with a steady hand cross off the phrase “good ol’-fashioned anal” before ripping the sheet of paper out of the pad and neatly folding it into its own envelope.  I write his address on the cover and put it aside for the moment, relishing the memory of sitting on top of him in the dark, his breathing shallow and yearning, as I lowered myself slowly onto his cock. I had slid back up almost immediately for more lube; once that was in place, delightfully messy and slippery, I found it much easier to slip him inside of me.  I could feel every throbbing vein on his cock against my tight muscles; I turned on a wand and sat on him, telling him to hold still while I brought myself to climax.  Once I’d come, my whole body relaxed, and I could start gliding along his cock – back and forth until I felt comfortable.  Until I wanted it deeper.  Until I came again, my whole pelvic floor contracting against him – which is when he lost it, moaning a guttural moan I’d never heard before. One of desperate release drawn out of him like a spirit.

My hunger not quite satisfied, I roll out of bed, throw on some sweats, and settle on grabbing a bagel down the street.  I clip our list onto the mailbox on my way out the door for the mail carrier to pick up the next day and giggle at the thought of her opening it or trying to use the light to see what’s inside.  On the way, I hear dull church bells ring in the distance, and once again I think of him; I hope he’s made it on time.

Wicked Wednesday... a place to be wickedly sexy or sexily wicked

Year of the ass: 2015 was, indeed, all about that bass*. (NSFR)

In a recent episode, Sex Nerd Sandra declared 2015 the year of the ass; I couldn’t agree more.  Personally, at least.  As it’s been noted in popular culture and mass media, both the ass itself as a desired body part (in terms of shape and size) and anal sex have become wildly popular in the past five or so years.  

The first time someone slipped a finger into my ass during sex (there’s a transition), I was straddling a dude from one of my college classes in his kitchen after we’d just played strip Trivial Pursuit (highly recommended).  His roommate and the friend I’d brought were off in a bedroom doing… whatever they were doing, and we were fucking on the kitchen floor, my legs wrapped around his waist.  I was already super aroused, so it wasn’t painful – just a new sensation that heightened my desire… and after a few moments, I really got into it.  I thought, “Why haven’t other guys done this?  Why haven’t I done this to other people?”  It opened a whole new pathway to pleasure for me. 

Fast forward a year, and I was having anal sex.  Sadly, it wouldn’t be until graduate school when I got into prostate play and pegging, but I got there eventually!  I found out that I love the way a dildo looks strapped onto the front of my body – how the curve of it complements my other curves, how its sheen draws the eye toward it, how the cool silicone feels cupped in my hand.  I love the act of penetrating (with anything, really); it gives me great pleasure to see the look on a partner’s face when I hit exactly the right spot, that desperate “please god – oh god – take me there” look.  I love the way a rectum will basically pull your finger (or a plug, or a dildo) in once you’re past the sphincter, as if to say, “Welcome!” and I love the way a prostate feels against my fingertip, the rounded ridge succumbing to gentle pressure.  I love hearing a partner tell me to press harder or in a different spot or with a certain motion.  Fuck.  Yes.

Image result for sunshine coming out of a butt

For various reasons, I didn’t get any anal play at ALL (a travesty, I know) for years – I had short-term partners who weren’t into it and I didn’t have long-term partners whom I really trusted.  And then, this year, I started dating someone who’s really into all things butt, and it was like the glorious heavens opened up and showered bright rays of buttshine down onto me.

This year, I:

  • Enjoyed analingus, both giving and receiving, completely sober for the first time in my life, and it’s FUCKING AWESOME.
  • Bought two butt plugs, one of which vibrates.  Why two, you ask?  I bought the first one online after being inspired by a GOTN post; the store said it was “small,” but it was decidedly not small.  I kept it and bought another one, because you can’t have too many.
  • Used both plugs while masturbating, in me during sex, and in my partner during sex, and just uuuunnnnggghhh.
  • Helped my partner achieve some incredibly intense orgasms with prostate play.
  • Had anal sex for the first time in almost a decade!!! 
  • Had anal sex in cowgirl position for the first time ever (it’s a lot easier, guys, especially if you’re fucking someone with a larger than average dick or dildo).  Thanks, lube.  You’re my friend.

My sweetheart has never been pegged but is super interested in it, so I’m wishing on all the shooting stars I see that that happens before he takes off later this month.  Keep your dildos crossed for me!  2015 was the year that re-introduced me to all things anal, and all the nerve endings in my nether regions are grateful.  

*Not that I have much of a bass.  Bone to pick with this song: treble clefs are still bottom heavy.  Can I get a musical symbol of a body type with a big rack and a firm but relatively small behind?  Cause that’s where I’m at.  Maybe imagine the bass clef upside down, and that’s what my boobs are like.